Have you ever felt like God just wasn’t answering your prayers? You were persistently praying, but nothing was happening. Or worse, it’s become painfully obvious the answer was “no.” The opportunity passed, the door closed, the job was filled, they married someone else.
What makes it hurt a little more is when your friend prays for the exact same thing and gets it immediately while you’ve been praying for years. You’re praying for a baby to love and your college roommate (Fertile Myrtle) just announced she is having her third (#blessed).
Why does it seem God answers other people’s prayers faster than yours? Why do you only hear crickets when you ask for an answer?
No’s
If you don’t know what to do with the “No’s” you’ll become disillusioned and maybe even walk away from faith. At the very least you’ll pray less and possibly start to wonder if all of this faith stuff is real.
When I’ve faced a “no” I remember this old saying…
When the request isn’t right God says…NO
When you’re not right God says…GROW
When the timing isn’t right God says…SLOW
When everything is right God says…GO
When the request isn’t right…
Sometimes what we are asking for isn’t what’s best for us. We think it is, but God sees everything. Some of God’s “no’s” aren’t because He doesn’t love us, but because He does. Most of the “no’s” parents tell their children are out of love, not out of a place of malice. I would even go so far as to say some of the weaker parenting moments are when they say “yes”. They are just so tired of the nagging and just want some peace and quiet so they give in. They have their own best interest in mind instead of their children’s. “No” can be very loving. No, you can’t stay up late. No, you can’t have another cookie. No, you can’t wear that to school.
We forget God is a loving parent too. God knows what that new promotion would really do to you and your family. Sure it would provide more money, but it will also cause you to never be at home.
God knows whether that person is right for how He made you and the plans He has for your future.
Sometimes God says “no” because the request isn’t right for His plan for us and what He is doing in the world.
When you’re not right…
Why do you really want this? See if you can look a little deeper and see what might be rattling around in your soul.
Ouch!
Why do you really feel like you need this? Are you trying to fill a need that only God can? A new job, a new house, a new spouse, a baby…they can’t bring lasting happiness. Only God can bring lasting peace and meaning.
Maybe there isn’t really anything wrong with what you’re asking it’s just that you’re not ready to handle what you’re asking for.
The new promotion would destroy your family. The increased platform would cause your ego to implode.
The problem is we think we are ready before God does. God isn’t interested in making you famous or wealthy. God is interested in maturing you to be like His Son Jesus.
Timing’s not right…
A “no” now, doesn’t mean “no” forever. It’s just means not right now. What do you do while you wait for the right time? You wait with others. You pray with others. You lean on their faith while yours is growing.
The Last 5%
Those 3 reasons cover about 95% of the prayers we pray, but not the most painful “no’s.”
About 5% of our prayers don’t fit neatly into one of those categories. Those are the “no’s” that are cancerous to our souls. They will make us or break us.
What inspires me the most as a pastor are those in the church I lead who have endured a painful “no” from God and yet continue following Jesus.
My brother-in-law is one of those people. We prayed and prayed as a church for God to heal his wife of cancer. God did several times, but the last time He said “no” and she’s waiting in Heaven for us. She was 45. Every week he brings his teenage son to church to worship the God who said “no.”
That’s a deep faith! There is something real and authentic about that kind of faith! I would even say…holy.
Why did God say “no”? I don’t know. I wish I did. I wish I had some cute little phrase to pass out for everyone who goes through the last 5%. The only thing I know is this is earth, this isn’t Heaven. And when our Christian Scriptures say we live on a broken planet it means something. When our Christian Scriptures say we need a Savior, now we know what that means.
As I look out at the sweet people in our church every week and see their incredible faith despite losing a spouse, losing a child, losing a job, losing their health, and so many other heartbreaking “no’s,” I’m inspired by their faith.
I think their faith is a powerful witness to people who are hungering for something real and honest. It doesn’t get any more real than that. Faith isn’t the absence of doubt and questions. No, it’s the continued belief despite your doubts and questions. If you didn’t have them you wouldn’t need faith in the first place.
When you gather each Sunday to worship the God who said “no” your faith means something. That kind of faith preaches loudly to people watching. That kind of faith is real. It’s been tested and proven genuine.
You don’t just love God for what He has done for you, but also because of what He hasn’t done.
How do you know if you have a deep faith?
How do you know if you are growing and maturing in your spirit?
You choose to gather with other followers of Jesus and worship the God who sometimes says, “No.”
Jesus once told one of his dear friends “No.” She asked Jesus to heal her brother who was sick (John 11:3). Jesus said “No”…by waiting. Why wouldn’t Jesus want to heal his friend? What was Jesus waiting for? He was waiting for her brother to die (John 11:6-7). He was waiting on things to get worse before they got better.
What was her response? She still held on to her faith (John 11:21-22). She still had faith in the one who told her “no.”
Right in the middle of her “no” Jesus gave her some instruction that has been something I’ve held onto through my own “no’s”.
She didn’t have to wait long to understand why Jesus said “no.” Jesus brought her brother back to life and many people believed (John 11:45). I can guarantee you will have to wait longer to see God’s glory revealed…maybe a lifetime.
But blessed are those who do not stumble because of what Jesus is doing in this world (Matt 11:6).
If you will only believe…despite receiving a “no”…you will see the glory of God revealed.
Will you?
