Have you ever felt like you invested in someone’s life and you didn’t see the change you had hoped for?
You poured a lot of time, energy, and love into the relationship, but now they aren’t part of your life. Maybe it was because they moved, had a life change, or you were heading in different directions. Whatever the reason it can make your investment feel pointless and maybe even like a waste of time.
But what if it really wasn’t a waste of time?
What if you weren’t a failure at all?
Just because you didn’t see the change you had hoped for or you couldn’t get them across some finish line doesn’t mean your investment was pointless.
Billy Graham is quoted as saying, “It takes 20 people to lead someone to Christ. The first person thinks they had nothing to do with it and the last person thinks they had everything to do with it.”
I really love the humility in this statement from a man who was #20 for millions of people. It’s a humility that acknowledges all the investments others have made to get them to that point.
I recently had the joy of being #20 for someone whose family had been praying for him for over 25 years. There were numerous other pastors who had invested in him and his family over the past 2 decades. My messages weren’t better, my people skills weren’t better, I was just #20.
St. Paul doesn’t use a number scale, but he says that some people plant the seed, some water it, and God makes it grow (1 Cor. 3:6-8). The important part according to Paul isn’t which role we play, but the role God plays.
When we lose sight of our number we either get prideful or discouraged.
PRIDEFUL
We get prideful thinking we are the next Billy Graham or we have some special divine favor on us, when there were lots of people before us who plowed the ground, planted the seed, and faithfully watered it. We dishonor their investment when we forget that we were just one of many people God used in their journey towards Him.
Pastors are the worst at remembering their place in someone’s journey because the nature of their role often allows them to be #20. The real heroes are the friends who have faithful loved on them and lived their faith in a real way. It was the friend’s example, not the pastor’s that even got them to church in the first place.
DISCOURAGED
Most Christians don’t struggle as much with pride as they do with discouragement when it comes to a friend’s spiritual journey. When we don’t see the change or the movement toward Christ that we had hoped it’s easy to think our efforts were pointless or we’re a failure. Nothing could be further from the truth. Maybe you were #8, #12, #18 and God will send someone else to pick up where you left off.
God will always send someone else.
When I listen closely to the story of some of my atheist friends it’s interesting how they always end up being friends with a person of devout faith. It’s true of your friends as well. God will keep bringing people in their life to point them to Him…a new neighbor…a new employee…a new family in school. For some reason, they keep bumping into good people who love Jesus. People they can’t explain away.
If you’re discouraged today about a friend, a spouse, or a child remember that God loves them more than you do. God will never stop bringing people into their lives to keep pushing them towards Him. Understanding this truth takes a lot of the pressure off.
The weight of the world doesn’t rest on your shoulders. Their eternal destiny isn’t based solely on you. You have a role to play or as Billy Graham said a number to be in their spiritual journey. God doesn’t need you to be all the numbers just a number. Maybe that number is a 1 and maybe it’s a 20, but no matter which it is remember you are only part of the story and that’s all you have to be. Resist being prideful or growing discouraged.
God’s plan is bigger than you know and He has friends everywhere. In fact, there isn’t a single place your friend, spouse, or child can go to escape God’s friends. He works in ways you can’t imagine or didn’t expect. Remember God doesn’t need you to be all of the numbers, just a number.
